You don't have to believe everything you think

Big ideas from a spiritual thought leader

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar - Thich Nhat Hanh

Buddhists say that anytime we experience a negative event in our lives, two arrows fly our way. Being physically struck by an arrow is painful. Being struck by a second emotional arrow is even more painful (suffering).

The Buddha explained, “In life, we can’t always control the first arrow. However, the second arrow is our reaction to the first. The second arrow is optional.

Can you avoid the second arrow, i.e. suffering? Can you choose not to suffer?

Sharing big ideas from Joseph Nguyen’s book “Don’t believe everything you think”, where he explains that if we can just stop thinking about our thoughts, we may end our suffering.

Reality is that the event happened, with no meaning, thinking, or interpretation of it. It’s not about the events that happen in our lives, but our interpretation of them, which causes us to feel good or bad about something.

Our feelings do not come from external events, but from our own thinking about the events. Therefore, we can only ever feel what we are thinking.

Our thoughts are a complex mix of experiences, biases, fears, and aspirations, shaped by our past, societal influences, and upbringing. You’ll be surprised to realise how many of these thoughts have no real relation to reality—most are illogical, just patterns we’ve inherited.

1. The Root Cause of Suffering

Nguyen asserts that suffering originates not from external events but from our thoughts about those events. This perspective suggests that detaching from our thoughts can reduce suffering, as thoughts create our perception of reality. When we let go of unnecessary thinking, we reconnect with our natural state of peace.

We only suffer when we believe our thoughts are true.

2. Thoughts vs. Thinking

In Joseph Nguyen’s view, “thoughts” are natural, spontaneous occurrences, while “thinking” is the act of analyzing or dwelling on those thoughts.